You’ve probably heard that babies need to develop good eye contact. It’s true, but it’s also not the whole story. The problem with this advice is that it can sound like something that should be easy for all parents to do when in reality parents themselves might be at fault for their baby’s poor eye contact. Babies don’t necessarily need better eye contact if they’re being held by someone who isn’t looking at them—and usually, when people talk about improving eye contact with babies, they mean their own eyes staring into theirs.
Parents are concerned that their babies don’t have good eye contact
You’re not alone in your concern. As a parent, you may have noticed that your baby doesn’t seem interested in looking at faces.
This is a common observation for parents of babies under 1-year-old. But there’s good news: It’s normal!
Many new moms and dads worry about their babies’ lack of eye contact because they’ve been told (falsely) that it means something is wrong. You should know that this isn’t true at all—it’s just one of the ways tech can affect our lives outside of screens.
Dr. Tovah Klein is a researcher and psychologist at Barnard College who leads the Barnard’s Center for Toddler Development, which studies child development and how parenting affects it.
Dr. Tovah Klein is a researcher and psychologist at Barnard College who leads the Barnard’s Center for Toddler Development, which studies child development and how parenting affects it.
She believes that there’s nothing wrong with using technology to communicate with your baby, but you should be careful about how much time your child spends on screens — no matter their age. Technology may be used both as a tool and as something that inhibits us from engaging with and watching our children, according to Dr. Klein said in an interview with CNN Business earlier this year.
All technology isn’t bad, but too much can be problematic.
Remember that technology isn’t always harmful. There are many benefits of technology, including its ability to help children learn and develop communication skills. However, too much screen time can be harmful to your child’s development. You should be mindful of how much time you allow your child to spend on electronics and how often you allow them to access the devices in their lives—and yes, that includes smartphones!
The human face is really important to babies and toddlers, says Klein.
The human face is really important to babies and toddlers, says Klein. “The first thing that babies see is our faces. They know that their caregivers have faces and they’re very interested in looking at them because it helps them learn about their environment and how they should behave around other people,” he says.
He points out that if you’re on your phone when your baby is trying to make eye contact with you, it could be frustrating for both of you. When your focus is elsewhere, you won’t be able to answer as well, he warns. When the infant is unable to obtain your attention, she will become upset.
Babies and toddlers learn to understand emotions from facial expressions.
Babies and toddlers learn to understand emotions from facial expressions and body language. They begin learning this process at birth. As a parent, you may have noticed how your baby will suddenly become quiet when you are sad or upset. This is because babies are very perceptive of their surroundings, including the emotions of others around them.
The same is true for adults: we pick up on subtle cues from people’s faces and body language that help us determine what is going on in their minds—or whether a person is trustworthy or not. For example, if someone looks away for an extended period during an interaction (especially if it’s repeated), it is likely, that he or she does not want to continue talking with us. Or perhaps if someone crosses his/her arms across his/her chest as we speak with him/her about something important, he/she could be nervous about what he/she has just heard—which means there may need to be more explanation before moving forward with whatever task needs completing next!
So it’s interesting that their parents want them to have better eye contact, but then the parents are the ones staring at their phones in the car, for example.
So it’s interesting that their parents want them to have better eye contact, but then the parents are the ones staring at their phones in the car, for example.
The other issue is that many of these parents are distracted by technology and don’t have time for their children. They don’t take turns talking or playing with them as much anymore because they’re busy on their phones. So they’re not paying attention to what they do when they come home from work and just put them straight on TV or give them a tablet instead of interacting with them.
You don’t want your child to develop an attachment to a device.
If your baby’s eyes are glued to a screen, it’s time to take action. Because research shows that babies learn more from faces than they do from devices. According to The Journal of Pediatrics, “the neural networks that process faces and voices develop rapidly over the first two years of life,” and this helps them understand the world around them. Meanwhile, “research suggests that interacting with digital media has negative effects on infants’ social development.”
So how can you balance screen time with face time? The answer is simple: limit your child’s exposure to screens (and apps) while they’re still learning how to talk and interact with others. As a general rule of thumb: don’t let your baby spend any more than two hours per day watching TV or playing games on their tablet or smartphone (this includes computers!).
Babies learn a lot from looking at faces, but if you’re on your phone that won’t happen
It’s a fact that babies learn a lot from looking at faces, and they tend to look at the same face over and over again. This is why parents need to be aware of what their baby is doing, even if they’re on their phones. For example, if you’re playing with your baby while you’re on your phone, they might start paying more attention to the device than to you because more stimuli are coming from that direction.
It may seem like an easy fix: just put down the phone when interacting with them! But for some parents this can be difficult; after all, you want your child’s attention 100% of the time so why not give them something else? The answer lies in attachment theory and how much social interaction babies need during infancy.
Conclusion
I think it’s a good idea to be aware of the amount of time your child spends on technology, but don’t worry too much about it. Babies will learn how to make eye contact with their parents over time, and they’ll also learn how to regulate their own screen time. At least if you’re talking with them regularly, they’ll know when enough is enough!